Looks like Christmas came early...and ALL over her face!

Aubrey O'Day has gone to new heights of whore-dom. She decided to prove to Puffy and the rest of Danity Lame that she isn't a hoe bag by posing for Playboy. Apparently all this will be released sometime within the next month. Hide your boyfriends because she will reach through the pages of this magazine and trap their cocks with her coochie cobwebs. I'm just kidding, Aubrey's cooze hasn't had a day of in YEARS. If it bears any cobwebs it's only for Halloween decorations. I used to be so Pro this hoe. I HONESTLY thought that Diddy was pimping her ass out on the sly and turning her into a hoe stroll superstar but alas...this is ALL self induced. I hope honestly that she can find her way out of this bimbo black hole and actually do something with herself...Do SomeTHING...NOT SomeONE.

Ewwwww-AH!

Um...Boo!

Since Beyonce has married Jay Z and Solange has gone just about as far as her sister coattails will allow Tina Knowles needs a new project. With Dereon Girls "Mother May I" has taken on the mission of getting young girls everywhere ready for that Hoe Stroll. Go from playground to penthouse in under 10 years! These girls have got sass and plenty of class! I'm sorry, but the combination of makeup, feather boas, and pimp hats don't even belong on the trash that performed at Chaos; why they hell would you put them on a child?! You know what? Just go the extra mile and come out with a Dereon Girls lingerie line. Better yet, put these lil vixens on a pole and let them earn money the old fashioned way. Climb that corporate ladder GIRLFRIEND!

Water on the Knee? OPERATION! My Beautiful Mommy? OPERATION!

Can't they have a panel where the mother is rubbing Crisco and cocoa butter on her stretch marks and C-section scar, staring into the mirror at her daughter cowering behind her calves as she whispers, "Look what your burden of a birth did to me...LOOOOOK!" I think the kids would understand then why mommy needed a change. It would be like they were never born! "Mommy wants to erase all physical signs of your existence, I wear these marks, RED AS A SCARLET LETTER to remind me what a bottle of Bartlett & James, a quickie in the back of a Saab and a busted condom can do to a body!"

NOooooooooo-se!

Noooooooooo-se!

I can't believe it. Why would they ruin yet another one of my fondest childhood memories?! I guess they picked the right troll for the part. At least they got the nose right, this slut got a chop shop schnoz job and she still came out looking like Angelica Houston in "Witches" or that red headed beaver bumper from Fraggle Rock. With all these remakes going on I'm thoroughly concerned about the "integrity" of the Hollywood hit machine. A Nightmare on Elm Street remake/prequel, Prom Night, and TV Favorites (of people that aren't me) like Beverly Hills 90210 and Charlies Angels aren't even safe. I swear to the all mighty Gods of Glamor that if they recast and produce another Melrose Place I'm bombing studios and pissing on Aaron Spellings grave. I mean if they are going to do it figuratively they might as well go the extra mile and get it done right! I can't Imagine anyone playing Amanda Woodward Like Heather Locklear. Evil, Manipulative, Constant wardrobe changer.

P to the S. The image is so large because I feel you need to recognize the face of evil when it's staring into your soul.

Electrical Current...Hallowed Be Thy Name.

"Lift my emotions and banish all my shame..."

Sometimes I find it helps for me to type with my eyes closed. It's difficult for me to actually put into words the way something makes me FEEL. Though this hasn't always been the case; I have had to evolve and adapt so that my ramblings writings mirror the muck and mire in my mind as an accurate representation.

Deja Vu...It think I dreamt it, a long time ago. This is always a strange phenomenon for me because it leads me to wonder what Deja Vu means, What does it mean in this situation? how am I supposed dissect this? Am I supposed to dissect this? Why did I feel so...connected? I've often thought that Deja Vu is our "Guides" "Spirits" "Higher Power" letting you know you are where you are meant to be. Almost like a road sign say, "Proceed, you are on the right path."

I had one of the most intense feelings of Deja Vu today. I was reading something a friend had written, I thought, "What a dork, lol." and I imagined how they would respond if I typed that. Which then led to this strange premonition of a succession of events that lead me to this thought...that this meant something more than what the surface reflected. As if staring into a mirrored pond and suddenly realizing it's an ocean of thought, do I jump inside and explore the coral reefs and seafare? Or do I just trace my fingers along the edge and watch the ripples expand into a thousand tiny tidal waves?

If you didn't see this coming you NEED some new peepers.

Just call me Ms. Cleo because I saw this shit coming from a MILE away.During taping of an episode of the Tyra Banks Show Tyra announces that she plans to make Isis Tsunami's dream of becoming a REAL WOMAN come true by presenting her with a free vaginoplasty. "This is not happening." Isis was heard saying, "I feel like I'm about to wake up." well bitch maybe you should. Wake the FUCK UP! You were USED! They had you on that show as a plot point and a "success" story. Don't you know there is no such thing as a free lunch?! Tyra is going to have you on call night and day as her surrogate snuu snuu. When one of her dates decides he wants a lil something something and she has to give it up all she has to do is dial a number and you'll be placed in her dark bedroom, ass naked and unconscious for this man to use.

Tyra is quickly becoming the next Oprah in waiting. I fear the day when I type her name on Mozilla Firefox and it's not underlined as a misspelling. I always judge that as a sign of importance. It's our job to keep her humble...by rubbing her face in her failure.

Wanda Sykes....Gay?

So apparently Wanda Sykes is a les. and for some reason people we astonished...Really?



Not to say that you can't be FOR Gay Marriage and be straight because that would just be silly. I'm just saying...she's wearing a freaking blazer...a freaking snake skin blazer. The prosecution rests.

I would personally have been more pleased to see Queen Latifah come out and admit that she likes to wet her face with peach cobbler.



As evidenced in her early film/television career the queen could only stretch her acting muscles as far as her talent would allow. In her OWN TV Show, "Living Single" she was eclipsed by a hilarious cast. In this movie, "Set it off" she fell RIGHT into the roll of a hardcore gat poppin gangsta lesbian bitch. Maybe she took inspiration from some of her fellow rappers...but then we have reality.